tired!

school has been a torment to me this two weeks. i'm especially missing someone that was and still is important to my life. but i know that we are impossible already. sometimes i just felt very sad that when i think about it. i just don't feel comfortable every night i sleep. without someone's hug, though hard i will go thru this, can't really think of anything that could fill my life except God but i'm like not glorifying him by my actions. i'm a bad example. please don't follow me, though i know no one will. (: recently my gan meimei, also experience this. i felt so sad for her as i know she also had the special person in her life just walked out on her. i dunno what to say or do to encourage her because i'm pretty much the same. my parents are divorcing, though sad but i know it will be a release of this ten years separation. as least a closure for the both of them, whatever they want to do, i think they should know what they are doing. they are adult, i'm just their son i can't do anything. i felt so helpless. this is the darkest period of time for my life, only my friends are there for me and my good good God. i really hope to see her smiling and be happy because that is all i wish for now. seeing her happy will also make me happy though it's not me that is giving her the happiness which i also think i can't give her that, at least someone is more capable of giving that to her. i wish u all the best for ur jap testes that are up-coming. God bless you. as for myself, i only can self-pity myself to a certain period of time, but fret not, the lord is with me. thank God for this time.

peace out. zR aka ex